:Sunday, December 31, 2006:

Things have changed so far as I can see. The weather,
people, the taste of chocolate etc. But the one thing that
I'll never try to understand for a change would be
why things can't come the way we want them too.

Fair may some say, hurting may others feel. I never
once stopped questioning that point but this is life
after all. Fun may it seem, I'm sure I'm happy the way
I am now. And all those thanks surely goes to them.

I don't jump. I just move around. Colors? I have seen.
Plastic? Non bio-degradable. Faces are masks and they
will be there. I have many people to thank for pulling me
out of lonliness.

Hah, I rekinded my family members. =) Thanks to my
nephew lurr.

New year's eve at tantric. Fun? Definitely.
Cindy? Roy? MY.BLUE.SPIN.

ahem.

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 12:17 AM| |

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:Monday, December 25, 2006:

Christmas eve countdown at tantric was
awesome. LALALA. I freaking had so much
fun there until I don't want to go home.

grahhh!

-.-

New year's eve at tantric too? YAY!

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 10:40 PM| |

__________

:Thursday, December 21, 2006:

General mood swings, second handed smoke, buzzling
street music mixed with confused human emotions and
a bad case of gastric. Bad health for the day coming to
a christmas moodless drink. The world's too complex
for a small minded person like me to understand.

Just following the crowd, see the happiness in them
wishing and hoping it could ever be mine. Asking for
the world or just that feeling. It ain't too much to ask
for is it? I've been taking arrows shot my way, bleeding
with each stab.

I need help. I really do.

Puzzles of my heart lay unfixed as wounds heal longer
than usual forming road cracks with each path taken.
Tell me I think to much, but actually, I'm not.

Its just because

Too little people understand me in this world.

And I have to keep everything to myself.

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 11:50 PM| |

__________

:Tuesday, December 19, 2006:

"this the season to be rainy, falalalala lalalala"


The weather's making me a moody boy. I'm getting
mouldy with all these dampness in my room. GRAH.

I walked home the same lonely old road with empty
cars and dim street lights at my side. My jumper's
wet from the rain and my mind's cluttered with
uncontrollable emotions with a mixture of rain and
tears running down my cheeks.

With the lyrics running around chasing cars through
my head, I can't get things out of my head enough to
be my immortal. =/ At this, I try to find solace with
myself in my cupboard and I've never felt so hurt in
me before. But I get stronger! AYE.

Ever wondered why the more we want something,
it doesn't come? so now I'm trying this, chant with me.

"I WANT MORE RAIN! I WANT MORE RAIN! YAY!"

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 11:58 PM| |

__________

:Monday, December 18, 2006:

For once yesterday night, I felt so little and small
in life. I felt no point having to continue with the
simplest talk of the town kind of senerio. Unless
someone can show me a garden that's busting
into life. I thank those who were with me
yesterday night. It was an ugly sight of me that
I wished the world would never see.

1 pack of cigarettes and alcohol only smooths
the situation but the after effects are horrid. Yet,
I'll still go along with the idea to drink all my
feelings away. I've got the clearer picture in my
situation. I've got the answer that I am looking
for.

Thanks Kenndra. I owe you loads.

Would you lie with me and just forget the world.

Benji

"I don't quite know, how to say, how I feel. Those three words are said too much but not enough"

| Stripped and Lusted 12:52 PM| |

__________

:Saturday, December 16, 2006:

After all the things that has happened, I wonder
to myself in the mids of the early morning. Is everything
just like that? Is that it? Is it just that and nothing
more? Too many questions has been stucked
in my already cluttered mind.

Benji needs to breathe again. I can't be pushed down
with the sight of this. Definitely. Confusion sets in
knowing the consquences. But knowing it, why still
go the distance? Just for the final answer or just
for that cheap trills? I can't help myself but think.

Is the distance just there or ought to be cleared up.
I don't know. I'm flushed with so many things infront
of me. I need to see the sunrise again. Will you?

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 5:36 AM| |

__________

:Thursday, December 14, 2006:

Went to Vivo with Gary today to rot. Met Doreen,
Kenndra and her BF there too. Vivo's uber boring
lurrr.. -.-lll

Headed to town soon after to meet Jimmy, Shuhui,
Eric, Weymen and Strider to watch After this Our
Exile.

In which J.J wasn't around and Jimmy cried like
an auntie watching korean dramas. >.< hahah.

Went off to Fat Mamas after that for supper again
and bitched like there's no tomorrow. *faints*
Gary's working first day today and thank god for
it to rain, its stay home day! *jumps around*
I'm so broke. Anyone care to donate to the
"Take care of Benji fund" this christmas? >.<

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 1:46 PM| |

__________

:Wednesday, December 13, 2006:

Winston, Gary, Jiawei, AH PEK, Fye, Shuhui and I.

| Stripped and Lusted 11:44 AM| |

__________

:Tuesday, December 12, 2006:

Towning again was the most memorable one to
date. Sliding to heeren to rot at spinelli's for 3
hours. HAH. I swear I won't go for plastic surgury.
*huge grins*

Okays okays, I want to get this over and done
with so I can hit the sacks. I need my beauty sleep.
aye. People were so happy today with laugher
everywhere. Hah. Cheeros.

No more Gucci sales already. =)

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 11:58 PM| |

__________

:Monday, December 11, 2006:

Its the time for christmas cause its DECEMBER
already. =) *WHINES* It's another 7 more days
before I'll be shipped off to Genting for 4 days.
Benji's going off for more CHILLING times aye.

I want to rant about the time I went clubbing on
Saturday. GRAHHHH. I can't wait till friday now.
BLEAH >.<

*jumps around*

I want to go clubbing with them again before I
get shipped off. =) AYE. I want to get the feeling
of being high again and this time fye you neinei.
You have to drink with me now. HAH

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 11:05 AM| |

__________

:Sunday, December 10, 2006:

I had so much fun last night although the beginning
started out slow. Was at 95 with cousin before meeting
fye, jiawei, jarrod and winston (I hope I got their names
right) hah, before going over to meet shuhui and gary.

So happened we talked alot yesterday night and well,
as many times as I said that things were so superficial,
I never really felt it that much till yesterday. Gosh Benji,
what in the world have you been thinking. You know
they don't stay. So thats that and it has ended.
I guess gary and shuhui were right. Call me a follower.
I couldn't care less but I know whats right and whats
not.

Thanks to fye and fern for hearing me out. Aye, the
feeling of getting high. =) Thanks for yesterday people.
I've never seen shuhui so happy before till yesterday.
Gawk. I hope next friday will be the same. =)

It has ended.

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 9:27 PM| |

__________

:Tuesday, December 05, 2006:

HO. Christmas season is in and I'm going to be
Santa now. Esp to my dearest LYDIA SEE HUILYN.
Come on sista, the things that you bitch will soon
come round my ear won't it? Santa's going to be
very nice on "compliments" this year for you, little
miss CROSS-DRESSER.

Not to mention those times with "the maid" *shivers*
and well, of course, the finger fucking time you had with
her. *opps* was I not supposed to say that? Well,
my blog falls into an ocean of blogs on the internet.
I doubt people will read yours cause your pool of
friends just revolve around your pussy right?

Let me guess. Not only are you poor, you fuck badly,
*ahem* finger fuck to be exact. Your parents are
christians and you're the failure "son" they wish
they never had. Wait, so now, you're a guy~ or a girl?
Hmmm, you're confusing me with all the cross-dressing.
Try to keep to just 1 sex will you? and Gawk, learn to
walk with your legs closed will you? its so LC. Like
your cheebye's stuck with toilet roll or something.

Your "cunning bitch" has just got started. Christmas
IS going to be fun this season. I guess, other than school,
you dont have anyone else of the same SEX TYPE to
rant to right? Cause I have this lesbianic crush on all
"your-so-called-friends-in-the-past-who-decided-to-
ditch-you-for-the-obvious-reasons"

Well, don't even compare me to you. It's like I'm the
jew and you're the sand. People like you are easy to come
by but people like me and my friends, ARE NOT. If you're
thinking of this fucking around with me, think hard.
Cause soon, I'll have everyone looking

Right

At

You.


Merry Christmas

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 10:12 PM| |

__________

:Monday, December 04, 2006:

And suddenly it struck me. It seems like everything
has gone back to it's original self. No more dramas,
no more tears and no more loneliness. Things have
gone back to normal.

The desperate feeling has came back to me over not
wanting to stay in Singapore anymore. I want to live
in australia where I could do just what I want. I should
have gone there when I had the chance. But who
knows. Jo's coming back and I've just viewed her photos.
I missed my times there.

If going there could make me live independently, I'll
fly over right now. I want to be on my own now.
I just want to go back to my apartment at the end of
the day, blast my music, have my cig and gin tonic
at my balcony enjoying the cool breeze of the night in
melbourne.

Sighs.

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 4:38 PM| |

__________

:Sunday, December 03, 2006:

I wish that I could sleep in on sundays again,
but I have to work. GRAH. I've been missing
out on alot of things this week. Not going out
and all, just staying at home watching Tvee like
a couch potato.

Party on friday was okay, big thanks to all
that took the effort to come down. I want to
go back clubbing again so I guess I'll be working
saturday next week so I can have the sundays
to sleep. I hope someone can cover my shift for
sunday.

Benji

| Stripped and Lusted 11:20 AM| |

__________