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:Thursday, April 27, 2006:

Things go unchanged. The way things were
18 years ago and the way things are now
are still similar in my sense.
I'm tired. I'm confused. I'm losing myself.
You poured everything inside you to me.
Making me pity every single bit of you.
But seems days later, you're carrying on
with life at the top of the clouds.

I mean that little in life. I really
mean that little. You asked for my trust.
Yet questioned it. What do you want of me.
You asked me what i'll do to help you,
just to cheer you up. I told you what i'll
do. And I did it. I gave my days. I gave
my time. I gave myself.
And now, I feel stupid. I feel used. I feel
dejected. Why? Its just caused of the every
single bit of you that made me up.

And now, since you're okay. I'm making
myself disappear. Away from you. Away from
everything that makes me think of you.
I stay alone forever to wait for the right
time. What are you waiting for. You don't
need me. You need me to pour your feelings
out. You need me to spend time with. You
need me to go out with you because you have
no one. You need me cause i'm just me.

But once you don't need me. I'm gone.
I'm not strong enough to avoid you now.
But it takes time. I'm hurt, and I still am over
my past. Thanks for making it a whole lot
easier. Oh, I guess I won't be having my birthday
this year. Just make a pass for me. My best
present would be sitting by the esplanade
without you, not thinking of you and hiding
in my solace. Afterall, I'm nothing. I lay
back into my silent bed. I cry my balls out.
Just because of you.

Benji


| Stripped and Lusted 10:57 PM| |

__________



about the boy.
'benji
02may88.taurus
maxatom@hotmail.com

sitting in the dark.
in a room. facing the wall.
looking back at the past.
wearing a mask, hiding the truth.
it's time to reveal everything.

gaps left behind.
the streets were wet and the gate was locked.
so i jumped it and let you in.
with your hand around my waist.
everything could be felt again.
and i knew that you meant it.

not forgetting.
Andy
Benji
Cindy
Chu Yang
Dennis
Darren
Fyedee
Gary
James
Jeremy
Jiawei
Jimmy
Jayden
Matthew
Max
Nick
Shuhui
Sean Remiel
Trent
Wei Hao
Xiaotaizi Didi

I declare.

I declare that there are losers in life. But nothing compares to those whom spam tagboards. Cause they have nothing better to do but try to beautify other people's life by the attention they are giving.

Blessed Be,



antiquity.